This is the second interview in my series on mom entrepreneurs. Carolyn Howell spent three decades rearing children. Her first child was born in the 1970s, her second in the '80s and her third in the '90s. And Howell wouldn't have done it any other way.

Carolyn Howell, 53, believes in long-term relationships. She has been married to her husband Ben for 35 years. She has worked with her business partner, lawyer Bob Reiver, for 31½ years. She was a part-time bookkeeper and then office manager for Reiver's Rockville, Md., law office and now she is vice president of Dulles Golf Center & Sports Park and managing partner of its Fun Company Picnics division, which Reiver bought in 1997.

When Reiver initially purchased the old Goal Post driving range (now Dulles Golf Center), he began to phase himself out of the law business and into the recreation business. He wasted no time putting Howell to work at the golf center and naming her vice president.

These two stable relationships are part of the reason Howell has been able to pursue a successful career and raise three children: Sky, 31; Stephanie, 25; and Blake, 16.

Howell was working when she became pregnant with her first child. She quit her job and planned to spend six months at home. However, when daughter Sky was 6 weeks old, Howell started working for Reiver, doing his accounting from her home.

That was 1978. Four years later, Howell started working two days a week in Reiver's office. She took 4-year-old Sky to preschool on those days.

When daughter Stephanie was born in July 1984, Howell took off only 10 days from work. "I felt great and my husband has always been very involved in every aspect of the kids' lives, so getting out the door two days a week was not a problem." She set up a baby bed for Stephanie in her office, where she could close the door and breast feed.

"There was never a question that the kids were my ultimate priority," Howell says. "However, Bob could be confident that I would get the work done, even if I stayed up until midnight."

Blake, born in 1993, became a fixture around the law firm by the time he was a month old. While all three children spent time in their mother's office, Blake spent the most time there because, by the time he was 4, Mom's office included a 16-acre sports park with a big play area, including miniature golf and batting cages. It was great fun for Blake but was a pretty significant change for the family.

"Leaving a Monday-through-Friday workweek for one that included weekends took a great deal of adjustment," Howell says. "I had to be available to answer phone calls and troubleshoot problems seven days a week. The staff at the golf center would call at all times of the day and night. Suddenly the job seemed to be controlling my life and that of my family.

"I wanted to do a good job but my husband and children were becoming increasingly frustrated as I seemed constantly working or preoccupied." The solution came in the form of a time management makeover and better delegation of duties. "I would designate a certain amount of time I would work each day and then stop. I would change my phone message to indicate when I would be available and return calls at those times only. I also included the kids in 'fun' work projects whenever possible."

While Blake enjoyed playing on the miniature golf course, he and his sisters knew they couldn't just rush into Mom's office when she had a meeting. At home, they learned to be polite. Going to work with their mother, they learned office decorum.

Asked what things she had done right in rearing her children, Howell presented a list:

1. She always described herself as a mommy with a job. Her first priority was her children's welfare.
    
2. She brought the children into her scheduled life. They learned to adapt with loving direction. "When you think of it, it makes sense that no businessperson in their right mind would let the newest employee hired in an entry-level position completely reorganize the company. So our children were a blessed addition to a family that was working well," Howell says
    
3. When the kids became teenagers, Howell encouraged them to bring their friends and parties home. "Teens have the life they let you see," she says. "Then they have the life with their friends. "I encouraged them to have the party here, so I could be part of both lives."
    
4. The Howells did most things as a family. They shopped for groceries as a family. Everything was an outing. This has kept them close, along with the family tradition they started more than 25 years ago of setting aside time once a week to talk as a family about a Bible principle that could enhance their family life. Even with the two daughters now married, they still get together two to three times a month for a family dinner or outing.
    
5. She participated in their school activities by balancing her work commitments.

Would she have done anything differently?

1. Howell says she would have spent more time in school activities with Sky. She learned how to manage her time better with Stephanie and Blake.
    
2. She was extremely strict with Sky, less so with the younger children. That was a lesson learned.
    
3. She would "lighten up." Howell says she tried too hard to be perfect as a first-time mother. She made her own baby food, buying fresh peas, cooking and mashing them and freezing them for later. Stephanie and Blake ate store-bought baby food.

"While there is something to be said for having your kids close together and getting your child-rearing all done at once, I would not have re-spaced my children," Howell says. "Each child had his or her own time with me. By the time the new child came along, the other one was already in school. This spacing definitely made it easier for me to pursue a career, since I never had two children in diapers or training pants at the same time."

Howell recently spoke to Sterling Women, a high-powered group of women entrepreneurs and professional women who meet monthly in Sterling, Va. She gave the group of 90 women this advice: "I made sure that I spent a lot of time with my children. They talk about quality time . . . The only way you can get really quality time is with quantity!"

Does this same principle relate to running a business? "Not necessarily," Howell says. "In business, if you learn how to work smart, you can put in quality time without letting the quantity erode your family life. It's a matter of not letting the tail (your career) wag the dog (your life)."