Wedded to the Business

Paul and Kathy Oliva have accomplished what many entrepreneurs and many married couples dream about. For the past 11 years, the Olivas, who have been a couple since they were teenagers, have owned and operated Prime Tune Auto Repair in Pompano Beach, Florida.

The Olivas’ success is twofold. They have a profitable and vibrant business, and they have achieved the elusive work-life balance so many of us strive for. The fact that they have done this together is icing on their cake.

For most copreneurs, no part of life is separate from the others; your financial, spiritual, professional and family lives are intertwined. As such, copreneurs face some unusual challenges--and reap some magnificent rewards.

The Olivas’ "one business, one family" lifestyle has allowed Kathy to be involved in school activities and to stay home with a sick child. On the other hand, since the Olivas have no secondary income, the whole family is dependent on the business. When business is off, they often take business worries home with them at night.

More than 3.6 million businesses in the U.S. are run by copreneurs, according to the U.S. Census Bureau's 2002 Economic Census. Certainly, no single model fits all of them. Some are part of a revolution that is pioneering a new model of marital and business equality. For others, their business is an extension of a traditional marriage where mom is behind the scenes and dad runs the show. The recent growth in copreneurship has been attributed to a wide variety of causes--everything from new franchise availability to the high cost of child care.

As a result of both my work with copreneurs and my personal experience as one--building my own business (AFriendlyDivorce.com) with my husband, David--I have come to see that there are no easy answers. What works for some will be disaster for others. However, some key concepts are essential to making copreneurship work. Here are my top five tips for working with your spouse.

• Be patient. It’s necessary to learn to work together. So, when you start a new business, be prepared for a learning curve. Kathy says that in the beginning, she would often go home in tears. It took time to establish the working relationship and the pace that the couple enjoy today.
   
• Find and define your shared vision and values. Shared vision and values are necessary for success. It’s important that copreneurs agree on the purpose of their business; is it a way of life or a way to earn an income? For the Olivas, family comes first. And, like other entrepreneurs, they make their business decisions based on their priorities and values. So Prime Tune is closed on Saturdays and Sundays, allowing Paul to coach the kids’ sports teams. The couple are willing to sacrifice the extra income for what is most important to them.
   
• Divide the work. The more distinction you have in your tasks and job descriptions, the better. For many couples, dividing tasks according to ability, not gender stereotypes, is difficult. But this is what often works best. As with all business partnerships, copreneurship will work best if you and your husband possess different skill sets. For the Olivas, it’s easy: Paul is in charge of fixing the cars, while Kathy, the people person, runs the office and the finances. However, things are usually not that clear-cut.
   
• Fight fair. Hear each other out. Keep all arguments focused on the current dispute instead of reverting back to old hurts and squabbles. And, when you disagree, give yourselves a cooling-off period before making the final decision.
   
• Put the saver, not the spender, in charge of money, finances and budgets. The spender may go kicking and screaming, but this is almost always the best business policy.

Copreneurship can destroy a marriage. So, before you take the plunge, honestly assess your situation. If you regularly struggle with control issues in your marriage, running a business together is not a great idea.

Remember, there is no getting away from your co-worker when you are married to him. You already know whether you and your husband operate as a team or as two individuals who happen to share a space and a future.