"Women need to stop waiting to be recognized and go after exactly what they
want," advises Christopher Flett, author of What Men Don’t Tell Women About
Business: Opening Up the Heavily Guarded Alpha Male Playbook. "First, women
need to stop competing to get on the 'guys' team. The only team in business now
is profitability. Second, women need to stop attacking each other and speaking
ill of others in the workplace. Finally, women need to stop inadvertently giving
up their power to alpha male clients and colleagues."
Through his online program, Ghost-CEO, Flett offers guidance to women
business owners, providing them with on-demand, downloadable coaching sessions.
Women typically look to build consensus and make sure everyone’s included, he
says. "Alpha males call this 'henning.' By having this focus, [women] make
concessions intended to bring people together, but instead, they give up their
power."
"Women shouldn't be victim to today's business cultures," says Maria Bailey,
founder and CEO of BSM Media, a $2 million marketing and media company in
Pompano Beach, Florida, that helps companies connect with and market to moms.
"If you act [as if] there is inequality, then you get inequality."
Bailey says two men can argue over business one moment, then be found on a
golf course the next. "[But if] two women disagree, they both stew over it for
weeks, taking it personally and getting emotional," she says.
Bailey, 44, thinks women get too emotional about business in general. "We
fall in love with our ideas and companies," she says. "Look at how few women
entrepreneurs have an exit strategy. So many women call their companies their
babies. What woman would get rid of her baby?" Nathan Kwast, managing member of
BecomeAlpha, a global organization that "teaches the arts and sciences of social
dominance," believes that women don’t understand the "power of neutrality." Says
Kwast, "[Women] mistakenly believe that blind aggression and displays of
dominance are necessary to attain power. They choose being perceived posi-tively
over grabbing for power, when, in reality, they can have both."
What can women entrepreneurs learn from alpha males? "Men are great at
getting to the point and not internalizing issues," says Bailey, who learned
long ago never to cry at work. "[Crying is] a sign of weakness," she explains.
Instead, "When I feel upset about a professional issue, I always ask myself,
‘What would a man do?’ And then I ask myself if it’s me creating the situation
or really a situation to worry about."
Originally published in the March 2008 issue of Entrepreneur magazine.