Sharing Values and Visions

Assess your values and visions with your partner to ensure a fruitful future.


Recently, Deb and Denise, business partners in a local real estate company, came to me for help. These high-energy women are driven to succeed, but Deb and Denise had fallen into an operational style that they called "orderly crisis." This wasn't a conscious decision, it was simply the pattern they'd adopted over time. They'd come to expect and accept that their business functioned in firefighting mode. To turn things around, the partners agreed to work with me on defining their shared values and creating a shared vision.

The process of finding Deb and Denise's shared values and vision started with lots of questions as each considered her ideas and ideals for the future. Ultimately, they agreed it was time to abandon the status quo, push themselves out of their comfort zone and face their deeper desires. Once they were clear on their values, they were able to design a meaningful plan, which includes a description of their shared vision and a blueprint for:

  • Following through on actions needed to make the vision a reality
  • Conveying their vision to their associates, colleagues, family and community
  • Holding true to the essence of their vision, even when reality changes it

What makes a great partnership and how can you foster one? Start with shared values and a shared vision as two of the most important components for partnership success.

What Are Your Values?
Your core values are the most important things in your life and bring you personal fulfillment. Your core values act like an internal compass. Just as the compass needle points to the magnetic north pole, your values will guide you in the right direction when you follow their pull. Being able to orient your work and your life around your core values can provide fulfillment, inspiration and satisfaction; however, living or working with misaligned values often brings draining obligations, boredom, confusion, tension and frustration. Our values direct our actions as well as our attitudes. They help us clarify what's good and bad.

Which of the following values are most important to you: balance, prosperity, security, freedom, happiness, wisdom, fame, ambition, honesty, imagination, logic, trustworthiness, a strong work ethic, intelligence, loyalty, health and wellbeing, or connection? Remember, your values and the priority you give specific values will change over time.


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Ask your partners to choose their core values from the list above. Do your values mesh? Sometimes we initially choose partners with similar values and sometimes a long-term connection will help your values come into alignment. Shared values will bring satisfaction and commitment to your workplace and your relationships. They'll serve to keep you united as well as guide you in decision making. If there is a serious conflict of values, though, it can wreak havoc in a relationship and leave you and your partner misdirected and misaligned.

What Is Your Vision?
If you had no time or financial constraints, what would your life look like? The answer to this question is your life vision. Putting this vision onto paper can help you achieve it. Reread it when you're making decisions. Base your decisions on which option will best enable you to live your vision.

Your vision is your plan and path for the future. It's where you want to go and how you intend to get there. The picture of your future begins in your imagination and once it's clear, your next step is to focus on living it. Ultimately, your life vision increases your clarity, enthusiasm and commitment. Knowing where you're going and how you intend to get there will contribute to the self-direction and drive necessary for success.

When you have shared a vision with a partner, you can focus together on your chosen path. This focus will help you increase your clarity, enthusiasm, communication and commitment. As people remain connected, their vision can become clearer. And as it gets clearer, you'll become more enthusiastic about its benefits. On the other hand, you may lose your vision when the difficulty of bringing it into reality leads to discouragement, opens the door to unmanageable conflicts, contradicts your views of the ideal future, weakens your connection to one another, or creates overwhelming demands.

You won't always share 100 percent of your values and visions with your partner, but if you keep in mind that you do have many common goals and beliefs--and return to them often--your partnership and your business will be better off.


Elinor Robin, Ph.D., is a mediator, mediation trainer, and conflict management consultant specializing in small business, partnership, family, and workplace disputes. You can find her on the web at www.elinorrobin.com.  





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